That nasty drink...

So I had to go to my Dr. appt today and do that awful 1 hour glucose tolerance test. That drink is absolutely horrible! It makes me cringe still just thinking about it and I've been done for hours. Hopefully one day they will come up with a better way to check for gestational diabetes because this is torture. Here's to hoping I pass so I don't have to do the 3 hour test.

I am officially 28 weeks and 3 days! Well over half way there and counting down the weeks until I can meet this little guy. We still do not have a name for the little doober yet as me and my husband just can't agree on one. I've picked out about 20 names and he doesn't like any of them. I started to pick on him about it saying he was just waiting for me to still be sedated after getting my tubes tied so that I would agree with whatever he said. 

I have also only gained 18 lbs this pregnancy (so far) so I am quite proud of that fact as I usually blow up like a balloon as soon as the test comes out positive. I did make some changes to my diet this time around though which might have helped. I started to eat healthier before I even knew I was pregnant and just kept that habit up and do not give in to (all) my cravings as they get pretty wild and random. 

I'm going to keep this one short as I am being called to watch Curious George by my 3 yr old. It's the little things that make me the happiest. 

Happy reading y'all!!

We're expecting!!

So we found out a couple of months ago that we are officially going to be a Party of 5! We are going to have our 3rd (and final) child; due in March. It's another boy which brings us to 1 girl and 2 boys, I am outnumbered now! I am currently 26 weeks and counting! So far everything has gone as planned as far as no problems with the pregnancy, which I was worried about due to the fact that we did not find out until I was over 4 months. So keeping my fingers crossed that things continue to go well and that we get all the baby stuff we need.

I will keep you posted! Happy reading y'all!

Happy Veterans Day!

As today is Veterans Day I decided to use today to thank the men and women who have served for our freedoms and rights and those currently serving. As a veteran myself and seeing the devastation of 9/11 I can humbly say thank you to you all. May we not forget that without these brave men and women this country would have fallen long ago. So please take a moment from your day and thank a soldier past or present.

(Image is from Google)

NaPloBoMo Day 6

Day 6: If I could change one thing about myself what would it be?

This is interesting for the simple reason that on any given day I can think of about 10 things I hate about myself, much to my husbands dismay. So for that reason I would change my views on how I see myself from the way I look to how I do things.

I would give myself more self esteem and more confidence in myself. I tell my daughter that she can do anything she puts her mind to and that she is pretty without makeup and don't listen to my own advice.

I have always had low self esteem, I've never thought of myself as pretty and to this day at the age of 31 happily married with 2 kids will still look at my husband and tell him how ugly I am and how I hate my body image and all sorts of things. He of course disagrees with everything I say and tries to get me to see myself how he does; however that doesn't always work and other times I just pretend it does.

So that is what I would change about myself and why.

NaPloBoMo days 2-3

So I am trying to catch up purely because I like the writing prompts that were given for the days I missed. I will then do a seperate blog post for today and start writing daily from there.

Day 2: My favorite character of all time. This took some consideration as I read a lot and watch movies. I picked Katniss from The Hunger Games, both the literary version and the movie version. She is strong, stood up for what she believed in and never backed down even when things got rough. We go through a lot on a daily basis but if I had to tell my daughter to be like one person it would be her. Stand up for yourself and others and never back down for what is right. Jennifer Lawrence also did a great job in representing the character in the book with what I thought was vey close to the book.

Day 3: Tell you about my writing place. This is kinda awkward at the moment as I don't have a set writing place due to not having our own home. I write wherever I can. If I get a chance and have Internet that it. Once we get our own place and our stuff out of storage and down here from NY I'll go back to writing at my desk and redo my vision boards to where I can see them when I write and have them motivate me in other aspects of my life as well.

NaPloBoMo

So I signed up to do a blog post a day the month of November through the BlogHer website. I am already behind :( due to working odd hours (one day will be evening and the next could be days or ovenights) and looking for a place to live since we have until the 15th of this month to be out of my brothers. So here goes on tying to catch up!

Day 1 was If you found one million dollars in the morning and had to spend it by nightfall, what would you do with the money?

Well for starters I'd definetely buy a house so that stessor would be gone. It would also be the house of mine and my husbands dreams! I would also pay off my car loan and pay off anything on mine and my husbands credit report. I would get my kids the things they needed along with stuff they didn't and spoil my husband with getting him a car and the motorcycle he's always wanted. I would help our parents with any financial situations that way they wouldn't have to worry about those anymore. I would buy our parents a home whereever they wanted. I would set up college funds for my kids with a little extra for their first house. After all this I would donate what was left to CTF as they are a charity near and dear to my heart.

I know this may sound blah to some people but after the last couple of months we have had I would love to be able to do this for my family.

Its been awhile....

I realize it has been forever since I have posted an entry on here and I feel like I have abandoned my tiny blog. I have reasons for not posting which include moving to a different state and trying to find jobs while staying with my brother.

We moved to SC 2 weeks ago and me and my husband have been job hunting since before we even hit the state with no luck yet. We are staying with my little brother in his 2 bedroom townhouse; so me, my husband and our 2 kids are all crammed together. Lets hope we find jobs soon and can get into our own place before long.

This month also seems to be the month of everything expiring; my nursing license (which I need to transfer to this state but don't have the money to do so at this point, which is hindering my job hunt) and my drivers license from NY also expires next Thursday on my birthday. I am waiting on my birth certificate from NY to transfer that which will hpefully arrive before then otherwise I might have to start all over which will not be a good thing as I am the sole driver between my husband and me.

On the flip side homeschooling Tayler through the k12 program has been doing pretty good. I can't open any documents on my computer from them as my computer is about to bite the dust and it won't let me but the school has been pretty considerate on that aspect. Hopefully she continues to do well so I can prove people wrong about homeschooling her. No one really wanted me to homeschool her as she has learning incapabilities due to her NF that cause me to spend more time then necessary doing all her lessons with her. I have kept her out of special education this long and I plan to continue to do so. NF will not hinder her and I will continue to teach her that it does not make her who she is but instead is just a part of who she is.

On that note I will leave this post at that and add more posts throughout the weekend and week now that we are a bit more settled. Wish me luck because I need it right now.

Pre-enrolled!

As many of you know we are in the process of moving back to my home state. I have also been getting all the paperwork for Tayler to start in her charter school program.

We are now officially pre-enrolled! I am only missing 2 documents and then she will officially be enrolled and her school books will be sent to my brothers where we are going to be temporarily staying.

Needless to say I am excited as this is the best program I have seen. They took everything into consideration and built in extra math help into her daily schedule. I am relieved that I will no longer have to fight to get her the extra help. Teachers will no longer look at me and say that I have the responsibility of teaching her at home as well until they find out that I DO work with her and for hours at a time after I would get out of work. My husband would work with her as well. That's when their attitude would change and I would get the help that she needed.

With this charter school I hope that we will finally have a stress free (as possible) and a successful school year. I shall keep ya'll posted with our progress. All smiles now!

Homeschooling thru a charter school

I have wanted to homeschool Tayler for a couple of years now. She gets left behind put pushed to the next grade at the same time. I have begged the school for an IEP or a 504 plan but they refused stating they did not have the extra staff to spend extra time with her on math and that I should be doing math with her at home. Little did they know until me and Tayler went to a conference with her teacher and principal that not only was I sitting with her and helping her with ALL her homework but I was also devoting at least 2 hours a day just to flashcards and math games to help her. They could not believe that after working a full time job I was coming home and spending all that time with her. Tayler does have some learning disabilities due to the NF1, but she can learn the age appropriate stuff as long as someone is willing to go the extra mile with her and help her more. They finally agreed to have the teacher do some extra help with her in the mornings and to cut her literature circle time in half to give the teacher time to help her then too. I felt like this was great that she was finally getting help she needed, but at the same time she was losing out on her group discussions about the book they were reading. I looked into homeschooling and charter schools. Because we live in NY state charter schools, which are online schools, are not acceptable but private charter schools are. The private charter schools were more expensive than the private schools in the area! Homeschooling really wasn't an option as I worked full time during the day and my husband works full time on overnights. When we found out we were moving to SC I decided to look up charter schools again. I found one through connectionsacademy.com and was amazed when watching the video for the school! I immediately started getting the necessary paperwork in and explaining our situation to them. They have been extrememly helpful and I already have her course listings, which include built in math tutoring and an extra life skills class. Tayler needs OT, PT and neurocognitive testing once we move. With the charter school it is still very regimented in that she can not miss more than 10 days or she will be kicked out of the school, but when we have our appointments as long as she has an internet connection she can attend school. This was a big thing for me she doesn't have to miss school anymore. And because SC accredits the school it is free, we have to supply the laptop, webcam and headset so she can see and talk to her teacher as well as hear them and the internet. But for the amount of help she is going to get this is a small price to pay! I will keep you updated as the school year progresses but I hope this is a dream come true for her!

Any success stories?

As I am sitting here with my cup of coffee at 9:15pm, I am applying to a lot of jobs via CareerBuilder and Monster. As many of you know who have read this we are on the verge of moving and have been staying with my mom and stepdad who have been awesome this whole month. My dilemma is I would rather work from home. I have worked in a medical office as a nurse for the past 2 1/2 almost 3 years but I really don't want to work outside of the home anymore. I have missed so much of my kids lives as they have been growing up. Tayler is 10 and has pointed out that I have always worked since she was born. She would rather me be back in school and home then working so that when she needs me I'm there. I would also be more available for all her doctor appointment and what she considers her life crises. I would also be there for Eathan who is 3 and 100% boy. He does not stop from the time he wakes up until I make him go to bed, the only problem with that it I'm exhausted after working all day and don't always want to play Power Rangers with him or run around the yard and I want that part of my life, I want him to have those memories as well as my daughter. Doug fully supports me in this endeavor as he would like to see me go back to school as well. Our problem is actually finding a company that will let me work from home. I don't want to work for one of those companies that you have to buy into and then are commissioned based or something like that. I want a legitimate job with a legitimate company. I am not saying that these companies are not legitimate, but I can not afford to hand out money to start working. My question to anyone who is reading this is: Do you have any advice, tips, success stories from what you have done or what someone you know has done? Any and all advice/comments are welcome and will be taken into consideration.

So this wasn't healthy but it was delicious!

I love to cook and since we have been staying at my mom and stepdads I got the oppurtunity to cook a recipe I found on Pinterest. This recipe is definitely not healthy in the least bit but it was so good! I've tried a lot of things on Pinterest and some work and some others didn't this one was an EPIC WIN!!! I am proud to say that everyone loved it and I will probably be making it again for them before we leave. It was easy to make and the directions were precise and clear cut, I did not have any questions about what I was supposed to do which set my mind at ease. I tend to get a little antsy and nervous when trying new things but this was great! Here is my picture of how it turned out: So now that I have completely fallen off track, starting tomorrow I will be starting all over again!

Am I wrong?

Does it make me a bad person that when we move I would rather not go to work? I have been working since I was 14 with literally maybe a 1 1/2 years off total due to an accident that broke my back and took my life 4 times and the births of my children. I have missed all the firsts with my daughter who is my oldest. She has NF1 so all firsts with her were extra special as it took her so much longer and she had to put so much more effort into doing everything and still does. I have almost missed all the firsts with my son, I was pregnant with him when I was in LPN school, graduated 7 weeks after having him and went to work a week after graduation and have not stopped since. I don't want to work anymore, I want to be able to enjoy my kids and my husband. I want to be the mom that has fresh baked goodies on a daily basis and dinners aren't just thrown together but are thought out and healthy. If something happens to my kids I don't want to worry about losing my job if I have to leave work. Growing up my mom was the stay at home mom and until I had kids I did not realize how lucky she was. As the teenager she was always there and I thought it was pain because I couldn't get anything past her. Now I realize how much I want that. I would give up anything to be able to stay at home with my kids once we move. I am willing to work from home because I wouldn't have to give up a whole lot with my kids and I would stop missing out on everything and having to schedule my daughters doctors appointments around my work schedule so that I don't have to take a lot of time off. I want to be a SAHM/WAHM. Now the big question is how am I going to accomplish this?

Time for change

I decided that with everything that has been going in my life it was time to make some changes. I have been trying to quit smoking for the past month and until recently was doing exceptinally well, then life happened and I fell off the bandwagon. I decided that I would make at least two changes this week. I want to be healthy for not just myself but my kids and husband as well, I need to be around for as long as possible ( who else will torture my husband the way I can? :) ). So I decided that one change I am starting this week is eating healthier. I am the biggest junk food addict you will probably ever meet, but today I took this to work instead for lunch:

This salad was incredibly delicious! Who knew that spinach leaves, mushrooms, tomato and cheese with a light garlic vinagarette would be so great! The other change I am going to make this week is too start NOT smoking again. This was an incredibly bad habit that I started when my daughter was 6 months old and the one thing in my life that I regret starting. Before then I was anti smoking and couldn't even stand the smell of the cigarettes. So here's to hoping that I can get back on track again! I will keep you posted with my progress whether I am doing good or not. I figure the more people that know my plans the more people I have to motivate me!

July Blog Hop!

This is my first ever blog hop and I'm hoping for the best experience I could possibly have. I have just joined Bloggy Moms and so far I love everything about it!

New Cookie try out

I am always trying new things. Today I decided to try a new healthy recipe that I found on allrecipes.com for banana oat cookies. My mom had some bananas that she needed to use up before they went bad and these turned out pretty dang good! I've been trying to be healthier for my kids and myself, unfortunately it's easier said than done, but with these cookies they were a hit with everyone! I suggest anyone looking for a delicious recipe should try this one out! The picture below does not do them justice as good as they taste.

You never realize

You never truly realize anything until it is either gone or you do not do it anymore. I knew I was a strong person, I've been through quite a bit in my 30 years; however, I did not realize I was this strong until we lost our house and moved in with my mom and stepdad for the next 6 weeks. I missed 3 days of work in the process of packing and putting all our stuff in storage and going to my moms house but we did it. And in a couple of weeks we will be starting a whole new life in a new state and this time we have vowed it will be better. I'm going to ask my mom to make a budget for us to strictly follow as my husband has a movie fetish and while I have a hard time buying things for myself I do love books way more than I should and then we also have the kids that neither of us can completely say no too.

I also took having my mom 30 minutes away for granted. Now that we are staying with her and Kevin and know that we are on limited time we are both trying to work and spend as much time together as possible. We don't know when exactly we will see each other again. I'm hoping it will be Christmas, but I don't know.

There is a saying that someone once told me," If you couldn't get through it God would not have brought you to it". After all our recent struggles I've come to firmly believe this. He would not put me and my husband through all of this if we could not have made it through it and come out better and stronger in the end.

I have learned that I still learn new things about myself on a daily basis. I have come out of this not unscathed. I have learned that I can be stronger than I thought I was, that the overwhelming love I have for my husband, kids and family can get stronger each day and that no matter what we will prevail and come out of it. You do need more than love but that is a great part of it. I have fallen more in love with my husband after all this started, which may sound odd considering all the details I have shared but he truly is a great man who put me and the kids best interests first and rather than get another apartment where we are decided the best option for us was to start a new life in the South.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Images from Google

Happy 4th!

I am going to keep this quick. Happy 4th of July and while we are out celebrating lets not forget the soldiers, past, present and future who have made this possible.

Learning all over...

In the past few weeks I have been missing. I'm not sure anyone in the blog world noticed but during this period of missing time I have been having to learn all over again. I've had to learn how to cope with the loss of our house, having to resign from my position at my office and breaking the news to them that I would be leaving at the end of the month, coping with giving our dog to the shelter as were unable to take her with us. We are now living with my mom and stepdad who have been great through all of this, offering not only a place for my family to stay, but an ear to listen to me rant, a budget plan to follow and so much more. These past few weeks have enforced what has always been important to me: my family; that no matter how much we may fight when it's most important and needed your family is always there for you and that sometimes you're friends are really needed. These are some quotes that have helped me the past couple of weeks and I'm hoping that they might help someone else as well. Life is messy and sometimes no matter how much you plan it out speed bumps and mountains get in the way. If we came out of this clean it means we didn't live just went by thinking we were. (Images are from Google).

Fundraiser progress!!!

As many of you know my daughter has Neurofibromatosis Type 1 or simply put NF1. After we came back from Boston Children's we had a whole new game plan and Tayler was ready to be more open about what she had. She also wanted to help the children's tumor foundation by raising money for research.
We had the idea of a small family fundraiser that quickly became something larger. She now has a venue to hold it at at our local VFW post, people willing to donate their time by selling homemade cupcakes which they are donating half the profits to the foundation, a 50/50 raffle and a 31 raffle plus so much more.
 One of our local papers is wanting to run a story about her, NF and her fundraiser! I could not be prouder if I tried. She truly is my hero because in the face of adversity she continues to shine.
If you want to know about her fundraiser or how to donate online comment and I'll give you the details and the link to her webpage for online donations. Lets work together and end NF!


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Date set for NF Fundraiser

As many people know my daughter Tayler has neurofibromatosis type 1 or rather NF 1 to save space. She has wanted to host a fundraiser to not only raise money but raise awareness as well. NF effects more people than Cystic Fibrosis and Muscular Dystrophy COMBINED and yet no one knows about it.

We are going to do a Tea for NF on June 22,2013. We are doing an actual and a virtual tea. The link to our webpage is http://ctf.kintera.org/teafornf2013/taylerscrusaders
The website is set up through The Children's Tumor Foundation and 100% of what we raise goes to them for research.

She has set a goal of $100.00 and I'm hoping she makes it. Lets help raise money and awareness for the children affected by this so that we can end NF one day.

What's your passion?

Everyone has a passion, some people have more than one. Your passion can de
scribe you or just entertain you in your free time. I don't have a whole lot of free time between working full time, my 2 kids, husband, 2 dogs and now 3 cats as ours just had kittens. What I have learned to do is have my kids join in. Now this may not be feasible for everyone depending on what your passion(s) is.

For me I can bring my kids in on at least 2 of my passions. I got the kids into tae bo, yoga and beating on the Wavemaster. At first it was not easy my 9 yr old is uncoordinated and was too self conscious at first even though we werep
 in our living room. After a few weeks she fell in love with it and is now the one asking if we can put the DVD's in. My 2 yr old is very active already so tae bo was great for him, however yoga took a couple months ago for him.

My other passions are reading, writing and running. I can devour entire books in a day if I had the time. I read everything, I don't think there is an author or genre I will not try at least once. My bookshelves have everything from Dickens to E.L. James on them. I currently started writing a novel. I've written poetry since I was in 5th grade and was even published online, but I want to write a book people will love. I'm not saying it's going to be the next great american novel but something people will enjoy reading and hopefully not want to put down.

I love to run. It calms me down and I feel so much happier when I'm done. I've done some 5K's and this year would like to add an 8 and 10K in as well. I don't get to run everyday so when I do get the chance I take full advantage of it. I have a running bucket list with races I want to do including a color me rad, warrior run and a marathon.

So those are my passions, what are yours?

Boston Marathon

Today for many should have been a happy day, a day of triumph, of victory and feelings of goals met and accomplishments achieved. Today was the Boston Marathon, one of the most notorious marathons around and one that many runners, myself included, dream about running in and seeing your time at the end.

Today that happy, joyous day was forever marred by not just one soul shattering blast but two blasts that were near the finish line. Many were injured and some list their lives. This is truly a tragic day for everyone. My thoughts and prayers are going out to all those that were there I wish there was more I could do.

What has our country come too? The government is trying to restrict gun laws which is not going to help, criminals will still get them. But what are they or everyone else going to do about today's tragedy? They were homemade bombs which means ingredients you can buy over the counter, but something must be done.

Misdiagnosed and starting over

As almost everyone who knows me knows I had an appointment at Boston Children's Hospital with my 9 1/2 year old daughter Tayler. I thought we might finally get some answers that were much needed about her neurofibromatosis type 2, which she had been diagnosed with at 6 months old. Instead what we were told knocked me off my feet, my daughter had been misdiagnosed that whole time and none of the other doctors we had been too had ever said anything or tried to do anything for her.

We waited an hour to see Dr. Ullrich after driving 7 hours at what was going to be my best effort to have someone listen to me and help my daughter. I had all her records with me and was determined that I was not leaving without the satisfaction of having her helped.

Dr. Ullrich came out and took us into a room, my mom and step dad had drove us there so my mom accompanied us into the room. It's better to have a second set of ears at these appointments. Five minutes into the exam with Tayler she starts pointing out neurofibromas on different parts of her body and says she has neurofibromatosis type 1 (NF1). This sent me reeling, what do I do now, where do we go from here, can you please help us, all of this and more kept coming out of my mouth. I was instantly terrified, I had read the past MRI reports and knew there was something wrong but I didn't think it was a misdiagnosis.

After my initial shock Dr. Ullrich went through everything with me, she showed me the MRI images and explained that the increased FLAIR was actually NF spots on her brain. She looked at her school reports and decided that we were starting over from scratch. I am nowgetting more help and answers than I could ever have dreamed of. Our new plan consists of waiting on referrals for OT, PT, speech, ophthalmology, neuropsychiatrist, neuropsychologist, school testing and the results to tell us how old her bones are.

I am eternally greatful to Dr. Ullrich and Boston Children's Hospital. I know my daughter is finally going to get the help she needs, the answers I deserve and I couldn't be happier with their service.

My dream job

If I was ever asked what my dream job was it would be A stay at home Mom and Wife. I have worked since I was 14 doing everything from babysitting, U.S. Army, waitressing, bartending and nursing. I have missed almost everything with my daughter who is almost 10 and only seen my sons first steps because he happened to do it on Labor Day and the office was closed so I was home. I love my job as a nurse and I love helping other people, but I would like to become more involved with my kids lives and be able to actively help with fundraising for NF research.

I envy the moms that get to stay home everyday and have special moments with their kids on a daily basis and be more active with them. I want to be the one raising my kids and baking delicious treats for them and cooking gourmet dinners for my family. I don't understand how some of these truly lucky women who stay home and squander the time they have with their families by arguing with their spouses and yelling at their children.

I would choose to be like my mother who was a stay at home mom when we were growing up. My mom never missed a school project, had cookies baking year round, did our homework with us, made homemade snacks for us to take to schools and so much more. I never thought I'd say it but today I would be like my mom and be with my kids, she had the right idea back then.

Hopefully one day before it's too late I too will have my dream job and no longer miss out on anything big or small I want to be there for it all.

My niche

This Is Going To Look Odd As My Phone Seems To Think It Needs To Capitalize The First Letter Of Every Word. But I Still Wanted To Make A Post As It Has Been Awhile. I've Been Doing Research On Blogging And Such, I Know Sounds Odd But Like I Said I'm A Newbie To This So I Figured It Wouldn't Hurt To Look Around.

While Reading Other Peoples Tips On What Made Their Blog Successful They Almost AllMentioned That They Had A Niche. Some People Have Parenting Blogs,Gardening Blogs,Marriage Blogs Etc. Which I Really Liked Some Of Them And Subscribed To Them.

So Then I Started Thinking About What My Niche Would Be To Draw In Readers And Followers. And I Decided That I Just Wanted To Be Me. I Can't Give Expert Marriage Advice Because I've Only Been Married For A Over A 1 1/2 Years. I Can't Give Expert Parenting Advice Because I'm Not Perfect As A Mother, I Make Mistakes Everyday And I Learn From Them. So While I Can Say Parenting Is Trial And Error And Will Share Things That Have And Have Not Worked With My Kids Along The Way With My Faux Pas That I Have Made Along The Learning Process I Am Just Me.

I Am Not Afraid To Be Me And After What Seems Like A Lifetime I Am Both Happy And Proud To Be Me. I Am Married To My Best Friend, Have 2 Kids Who I Love Dearly Even Though They Do Drive Me Nuts Sometimes And Have A Supportive Family.

I Hope That Others Will Like Me And Help This Lil Blog Of Mine Get Up And Running Because I Have Big Plans For It I Just Need Some Help From ya'll.

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Seriously lacking

I am seriously lacking on making this blog what I want it to be. I finally have some semblance of Internet at my house, so I have been trying for the past 3 hours to make my own grab button and join bloggin sites like Blog Lovin so I can try to get some followers. I have managed to join Blog Lovin but have yet to be able to claim my lil blog on there. However I did manage to find some blogs that look really interesting. I really hope I can get some stuff done soon as I realize I have the most boring blog on the Internet as we speak and desperately hoping to change that and gain a faithful readership. So if anyone does happen to come across this blog who wouldn't mind helping a newbie like myself, please feel free to leave your advice or any kind of assistance. Any and all will be taken into consideration and probably used as long as I feel it does not stray from who I am or what I ultimately want this blog to be. With that being said I am going to go see if I can make any more progress on anything I have been trying to do tonight before calling it quits for the day.

No longer afraid

It took until I was 30 to break out of my comfort zone when it concerned my hair and wearing makeup. I was always such a tomboy growing up more interested in sports and climbing trees that I never cared what I looked like. As I got older I just got insecure abouy howvI looked but didn't know how to fix it.
So I decided that 30 would be my break out year. I cut my hair into a bob that I actually love, put make up on even on the weekends and vowed that my sweatpants and hoodies would be saved for wearing to bed or when I was sick only. The reason I was no longer afraid to try new things is rather simple...my husband. Doug is brutally honest with me when I ask him questions and I'm glad he is otherwise I might never have broken out of my shell. I know Doug loved me even with no makeup and sweatpants and hoodies on but I feel better when we go somewhere and he looks so proud to be seen with me.
Granted I still have to wear scrubs to work but that does not mean that I also don't have to do my hair and makeup. I can no longer use the old ponytail standby and I'm glad. Although this means that I will actually have to get up on time now :).
So here's to one of my new beginnings and a lesson to everyone out there that it is never to late or you are never too old to change something about yourself.

I am currently...

Thought I would do a post about what I am currently doing so here goes.
I am currently counting down the seconds until work is over with.
I am reading Fifty Shades of Gray (and loving it)and also reading A Collection of American Short Stories.
Listening to the radio which is playing one of my favorite singers who I would love to meet Blake Shelton.
And last but not least heading home to my hubby and kids.

To the love of my life

Today is a special day, today is the day that the love of my life was born. He turns a whooping 33 today, but shhh don't tell him I told you he's being overly sensitive about his age. But if he had not been born today I would not have met my soul mate, my best friend, the shoulder I cry on, the father of our son, the most wonderful stepfather my daughter could have asked for,the keeper of my innermost secrets, the man who has stayed by my side even when I was being an idiot and still loved me. Without him I would be nothing.
It wasn't always easy but I guess things that are worth it never are. He is definitely worth walking through fire for and fighting for. It took a pretty rough patch that we went through that was caused by me to make me truly open my eyes and see how lucky I am to have this man. I love him more than I thought possible.
So before I get too mushy on here I'll end this with a simple Thank God you were born today and thank God for bringing you into my life I could not have asked for better because you are the best there is. I love you for always and a day

This blog...

With this blog I am not out to try and change the world, I am not trying to force people to believe in a certain thing or force them to like my opinions.
This blog is used for my opinions, beliefs and personal goings on in my life. I will use this blog to raise awareness for Neurofibromatosis as it affects my life personally thru my daughter. There is not enough people that know about this and research funding has been threatened to be cut. Yes it is a rare disease that few people have heard about but that doesn't mean a cure should be given up on.
This blog is my own and if you do not like it I am not forcing you too look at it. Do I want followers, Heck yeah I do! Do I want this to grow into something bigger, Heck yeah! And hopefully with time it will.

The music I love

So many people are surprised when I say all I listen to is country music (unless my hubby is in the car & that is only because I have not yet converted him 100%). They get even more shocked when I say I've been listening to it since I was in 5th grade and I'm responsible for getting my parents to listen to it as well. I guess I love it so much because no matter what mood I am in or what kind of day I am having or whatever life is throwing at me I can always find a country song that fits and I can relate to. And when I had my violin I could teach myself to play my favorite songs, 4 bows later I nailed The Devil went down to Georgia by Charlie Daniels in 4th grade. Man I miss my violin and really want to get another one.
But anyways, I also love the music because it teaches you things as well. It taught me to never be ashamed of who I am so now even though I have been living in NY for almost 5 years I no longer try to hide my twang when it comes out. I also will rock a sundress and boots and not care if people up here look at me funny. It taught me to always follow your dreams because as the song goes," one year they repossess your truck and the next you make a couple million bucks". Now I am not saying that I will ever even see a million bucks but if you don't follow your dreams and give up instead you will never know what is just waiting out there for you. It taught me to never forget where you came from, how to love, how a man should treat you and what to do if he doesn't ;) (Miranda fans will understand the last part). There is so much that it has taught me and continues to teach me that I could write forver and not run out of words. So for the sake of not writing a novel about my love for the music and culture I will stop now :). And of course going back to listening to Blake Shelton, Miranda Lambert, Thomas Rhett, Reba, Jason Aldean, Luke Bryan, Brantley Gilbert, Lady A, The Band Perry and all my other favorites!

New adventure

Over the weekend I discovered two new adventures for my family and I. The first one is MMA. I know you're probably thinking why would anyone want to get hit and what not, but MMA is so much more than just beating people up and/or getting beat up. It teaches discipline, mind and body strength among other things. So after discovering The Power of 1 MMA at our local mall we were ecstatic! We plan on going as a family and my husband and I want to advance all the way to a full teacher and then open up our own business.
The second adventure goes along with the first. I decided back in November I wanted to eat healthier. I was eating better as far as fruits and vegetables and drinking more water, but I had no clue as to portion sizes or how to balance every meal correctly. Now thanks to my mom I have a great list to start from. And I can get the kids and husband in on it as well to make our entire family healthier! 
I can not wait to get started on these adventures! I am so excited it's like Christmas morning for me!

Withdrawl....

I am having serious withdrawl from the Internet. I have not had the Internet at my house since the end of August and it is slowly killing me! Everything I have been doing has been on my phone which is getting frustrating because it is not allowing me to do so much with this blog that I want to. This blog does not look like what I have planned for it and I can not wait until the day comes that I can finish the set up and layout for this blog which has become a new pet project of mine. So with fingers crossed, god willing and the creek don't rise I'll have the Internet again soon!

Lessons my parents taught me

As I've gotten older I realize that my parents taught me some important lessons that I actually remembered! Who would have thought that anything really stuck in there with all my eye rolling, yeah yeah's and generally just not listening like every other teenager. Maybe they stuck because they started teaching them so early. These are some of them:
             1) Do it right the first time around.
             2) Have pride in yourself and everything you do no matter how big or small it is.
             3) Never be the person who started the fight but always defend yourself.
             4) Always keep your house clean, you never know who could stop over.
             5) Always treat people like you want to be treated.
             6) Always use your manners and respect your elders. Yes Ma'am and No Sir are never wrong to use.
             7) Never forget where you came from or how you got to where you are today.
             8) Blood is thicker than water, when it boils down to it your family will always be there.
             9) Be the kind of person your kids would be proud to call Mom.
             10) Live life to the fullest and regret nothing that you did.

These are just the first 10 that popped into my head. I have to give my parents credit, I was definitely not the easiest kid to raise and I always did the opposite of what they said, but I think I turned out pretty good. These will be lessons I also pass down to my children.

Waiting

In the Army I was quickly taught the meaning of the saying,"Hurry up and wait". You would think I would be the most patient person in the world. Well I'm not. I absolutely hate waiting, it drives me insane.
The reason for my current insanity is getting Taylers new patient paperwork in the mail. I'm the kind of person who wants them filled out and sent back in with all the MRI's and everything well before her appointment. So I called Boston Childrens Hospital today on my lunch break only to recieve a voicemail stating that it would be sent out in a couple of weeks! A couple of weeks, I was dumbfounded. So here I am hurry up to wait. April 1st can not get here fast enough.

What has happened??

What happened to teaching your kids to have a work ethic, earning what they want and having pride in themselves and their accomplishments?
I was raised in a house where at the age of 5 you had chores and my allowance was .25¢ a week ( it was a whopping $5.00 by the time I graduated high school). If I wanted something I had to earn it. I wanted a TV in 3rd grade to play my Nintendo on I saved and saved and by the end of summer was able to buy a black and white tiny TV at a yard sale. I also bought most of my games and let me just say that I treated them a whole lot better than if they had just been given to me because I wanted them. 
People look at me funny today when I tell them that my daughter earns what she wants.  That was how I was raised and I wanted her to have the joy in telling people I earned or bought this. I wanted her to have a good work ethic from the very beginning and pride in everything she does. She actually is starting to understand this and is taking pride in more. I will continue this lesson on with my son as well because that is how things should be. I have worked for everything I have and have no shame even if it is not shiny and brand new, I can still call it mine.
Too many kids are having everything handed to them willy nilly and not having any respect for how they got it. If it breaks or gets lost they don't care because they know mom and dad will just replaceit anyways. I'm not knocking the parents that do this either, we all want more for our kids than we had growing up. Lets not lose sight of things though along the way.

Tea for NF

My daughter Tayler has been living with NF since birth. She was first diagnosed at 6 months old. Since then it has been a struggle at times but that amazing little girl has never lost her smile. Now at 9 1/2 she wants to talk to others about it so that other kids do not get picked on like she has. She also wants to do a fundraiser to raise money for my awareness and research. I am currently awaiting to hear back about how to set it up. She is super excited though so hopefully we will have some news about it soon so we can get started. Looking forward to this new adventure with her.

The beginning...

This will be the first post in my journey, I am starting as far back as I can remember so bear with me...

As a kid I actually had it pretty good. We never starved or went without stuff we needed. Our parents would go without before we would. There is 5 of us in all, mom, dad, sister and brother. We were spaced kinda far apart with me being the oldest. Me and my sister are 5 1/2 years apart and me and my brother 7 1/2 years apart.

I was 5 1/2 when my sister came into the picture. By then I was pretty set in my ways of having everyones attention so the thought of a sibling did NOT appeal to me at all. When I was asked if I wanted a brother or a sister I said I wanted a brother... and was told that is what I was getting a baby brother. Imagine my surprise while I was staying at my aunt and uncles when they called to tell me I had a little sister. I hung up on my mom and refused to speak to my dad when he came to see me. I was as mad as a 5 year old could get. The result that day I got to ride a prize bull and shoot a rifle to put it simply I was in 7th heaven. Once she was home completely different story but more on that later.

At 7 1/2 I finally was used to my sister and had stopped trying to sell her to random people and ended up with a baby brother. I got used to him a lot quicker probably because a brother was what I wanted in the first place. Don't get me wrong tjere was still plenty of fighting especially since he seemed to be a freaking genius.

Through this though while not always being the best of situations my parents did whatever was needed to take care of us while giving us each attention trying to be equal about it. Was it always equal... no but I was alright with it...MOST of the time.

So I am going to end this one and pick up at a later time.

Happy Valentines Day

I hope everyone has a good Valentines Day. As per our usual bad news hit the day before, but unlike every other time this has happened Doug and I are sure we will get through it okay. Over the years I've also come to realize that this over commercialized holiday is just another day. I don't need extravagant gifts to know my husband loves me. He shows me everday with everything he does for us and all the hard times we have already been through. I love that man like I have never loved anyone before, he truly showed me what love is and I am eternally greatful that we found each other.

Fat Tuesday!

Happy Fat Tuesday! Easter seems to have come too quickly this year. As I was explaining Lent to Tayler last night, she made me wonder how all this got so far out of whack. She thought Easter was just about the egg dying, Easter dinner and the Easter basket from the Easter Bunny. This brought on a kind of problem for me as I was trying to explain it without bursting her bubble since she still believes in the Easter Bunny and Santa. Which is fine by me because I hate admitting that she is growing up.
So without bursting her world I explained to her about Jesus Christ rising again and this was a celebration of that. She understood that and was happy that we still celebrated. She then proceeded to tell me that she didn't think we celebrated Jesus enough. This actually kind of hurt me and has made me realize that we need to start going back to church. I took responsibility for that because we haven't been to church in years. It's not that I don't believe because I definitely believe that there is a higher power out there.

So with all that being said and tomorrow being Lent everyone is supposed to give up something. I think I will give up..... being so pessimistic about everything.

Progressing

Hopefully this is progressing like I want it too. At the moment we do not have internet so I am setting all this up and posting via my phone. What would I do without my Droid!
As I get this thing going more I hope to gain readers, find other blogs I like, do some link ups and maybe way down the road make some money.
That's all for the moment more to come later!

Introduction

This is the first time I have blogged. I am a little nervous about it,but am hoping for a great experience. So on to a little about me.
I am a 30 year old mom, wife and LPN. I have 2 wonderful kids aged 9 1/2 and 3 1/2. My oldest has neurofibromatosis. My youngest is a handful and ALL boy lol, but I wouldn't trade them for all the money in the world. I married the man I am madly in love with 1 1/2 yrs ago and have been together for almost 4 yrs now.
As I have gotten older I've realized that family truly is more important than anything else and not just my immediate family but extended as well.
So with all that being said here goes nothing!